Complexity Page 3
I plopped onto my cushioned couch and sipped at my coffee, too lazy to reach for the T.V. remote. So I just sat there hanging out, trying to decide what the hell to do today. By the time I'd chugged my first cup, I thought it would probably be best if I snuck in some much-needed yoga today. My body was a wreck, and I felt like a mess inside and out.
Whenever I went to yoga, I always felt like trying a little too hard when I dressed for it. I picked a pair of glossy black yoga tights, showing off my rock-hard ass and legs. I contrasted it with a fitted red shirt, the sleeves snug against my biceps. It was probably vain, but I liked the attention it got me, from both men and women. I slid into a downward-facing dog on the yogi's instruction, enjoying the view behind a voluptuous brunette. She held the position exquisitely well.
As we moved into a sphynx position, my dirty thoughts wondered how Cecelia would look bending over in front of me. Everything about her seemed amazing. I couldn't wait for Friday to come. I quickly chastised myself for getting carried away in yoga, where I was supposed to go to forget about Cecelia for a while. I retrained my focus and moved into a camel pose with the rest of the class, letting go of my thoughts.
The rest of my workout was uneventful. I liked to run at a punishing pace around the suspended rubber track. I always made sure to take care of my body; I never wanted to be one of those people who wore tights but clearly never should. That, and I loved the looks I got from everyone when I paraded around the track, glistening sweat.
I was just entering the changing rooms when I swore I saw the dark brown short locks of Nikolas. Was I seeing things, or did he go to my gym all of a sudden? I had never seen him before today; I must have just imagined him. That's what I get for daydreaming about him all day. I waved it off and hopped into the shower, cleansing myself.
It wasn't until I was on my way out of the lobby that I felt someone staring at me. I stopped, confused, and looked around until I spotted him. I felt a smile tug at the corners of my mouth, realizing he was actually here and I wasn't crazy. I headed over to him, glad I'd slipped back into my yoga clothes to leave.
"It's you again," I breathed, stopping in front of him. I always found it easy to relax around anyone as sexy as him. My hands fell on my hips and I eyed him. "How have I not seen you here before?" I was sure I would've noticed a body like his a hell of a lot sooner. What brings him here all of a sudden?
"Considering I could own any building in New York if I wanted to, I tend to have privatized time. I don't care for sharing." Nikolas' expression gave nothing away, a stony mask. His arms slowly crossed his chest and he exuded dominance. "I'd appreciate it if you were to leave Cecelia alone." Ah, the cat was out of the bag now. He didn't like the idea of someone else taking what he wanted. So he came here to threaten me. All Nikolas did by coming here was make me want him and Cecelia more. I had to change the way I was standing. I didn't want to draw attention to the fact that he was arousing me in broad daylight in a public place. I rested on one leg and folded my arms over my chest. I folded my arms a little too tight, peacocking for Nikolas, because why the hell not?
"Now why would I do that?" I didn't want to break his heart, but Cecelia was the one who'd been texting me about grabbing drinks together, not him. Oh well, I could still have some fun with him. "It seemed like last night, she rejected you more than once. Actually, she seemed to leave for the night shortly after you arrived." I raised a brow at him, hoping to aggravate him and see him bristle.
"A mere misunderstanding," he said through clenched teeth. He didn't like what I had to say, but he composed himself before continuing. "But let me be clear with you. There's no room for you." He glared at me, his blue eyes like daggers, trying to scare me off. He turned briefly to look outside, then looked back at me, his head tilting ever so slightly. I couldn't help but see where this went. Maybe if I played my cards right, I could have him and Cecelia.
"Why don't we let Cecelia decide?" His stare iced over, then he took a step, only inches away from my face. He was throwing off some major body heat.
"As I told you, I don't care for sharing." Immediately after he said that, he turned away from me and marched out of the gym complex like he was on a mission. In that moment, I couldn't decide whose glutes were better – Nikolas' or Cecelia's.
On the cab ride home, I felt my phone vibrate and had the satisfaction of seeing Cecelia's name flash across my screen.
We still on for Friday?
Absolutely. Unless you have time for me sooner?
My boss would have my head if I ducked out on work this week.
Ha! I know the feeling. I can't wait to see you again. I hope you'll wear something like that red dress again. I couldn't help myself. Although I'm sure she looked amazing in anything she wore, or if she was wearing nothing.
I'm sure I have a little black dress for the occasion.
I'm excited already. I had to stop myself because the cab had pulled up to my place. I was lucky it was Sunday, but I actually had a lot of work I'd been ignoring for a while now. Miranda wasn't exactly thrilled when her senior editor decided to just do nothing for almost a week. Now I had about 200 pages to read through in 24 hours.
As soon as I set foot inside my apartment, I stripped back down and crawled into some comfy sweats. If I could focus on work for five days, then I'd be rewarded with Cecelia. I smiled wryly at the thought.
Work seemed to drag, but at the same time I was so unbelievably far behind that I willed it to go by quickly. Cece was flirting with me on and off for a few days whenever we texted, and she sent nothing but good vibes my way. These past few days, she basically ran nonstop through my mind. I was going to try and save it for her, but she was too beautiful and I had the sexual drive of a raging teenager. I must have masturbated to the vision of her in that red lace dress twice a day. The dress had barely covered her rear and it was such a tease, now burned into my brain. I could only imagine what she would slip into for drinks tonight.
I wanted to be irresistible to her tonight, so I put a lot of effort into my outfit tonight. I'd decided to go with a silver Armani suit and a striking blue tie. Both matched my eyes and all of my Armani were custom-tailored to have an extra-slim fit. I wanted my body to be on total display for her tonight. Show her everything she could have, and everything I could give her. I knew I would never have the animalistic magnetism of Nikolas in his three-piece suits, but I looked attractive as hell. I was sure Cece would think so too.
I got to Provado a little early, but Cece was already there waiting for me. I shot her my classic panty-dropping smile as I strode over to her. When I sat down, she was visibly nervous. A pang in my heart found it adorable.
"I've always loved this place," I began. "I've been coming here for years now."
"Really?" She seemed genuinely surprised. "This is one of my favorite places. I've been coming here since I moved to New York." She smiled, relaxing a little, and was just as perplexed as I was.
"That seems to be happening to me a lot lately. Maybe I'm just shit at noticing that. Although I must have been pretty drunk to not remember you here." I reached out and began stroking her hand with my thumb, tracing her knuckles lightly. She shifted in her seat, aroused by my touch. We stared at each other, revealing of our desire for each other. I smiled in response, finally taking her all in. She was wearing a little black dress, just as she'd promised. It was a soft black fabric with her chest exposed down the middle, covered only by some see-through black mesh fabric. I could see her cleavage just as easily if she were naked. Thank you, god, for letting me have this woman. It took all my energy not to tear her clothes off in the lounge.
My arousing daydream was interrupted when I felt her hand stiffen and she drew away from me, sitting rigid in her own seat. My brow furrowed, and I followed her line of sight. Then I felt my jaw and my cock stiffen automatically in response.
Nikolas walked through the door and headed to our table, his mischievous smile plain across his face.
Chapter 4
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br /> "We need brunch. And I need help, A.S.A.P."
"Good. I'm hung over as hell and I could use a mimosa. I'll be there in 20." The line went dead, and I fell back against my array of pillows. My head hurt, but it wasn't from the drinks I'd had last night.
Last night had left me feeling aroused and sexually frustrated all at once. If Ame hadn't pulled me out of there, I don't know what I would've done. Nikolas was so aggravating to be around, mostly because he belittled my career and work nearly every moment we were together. Yet I was drawn to him. I could feel the pent-up energy behind him, the excitement of working hard to accomplish something. Every time I rejected him, it only made him work harder to win my affection. He was someone I would always clash with, both of us aggressive in our work and careers. I couldn't see him relaxing and easing into a relationship. I knew I shouldn't be with a man like that, no matter how attractive he was on a primal level, but the longer I was around him, the more I wanted him. The raw magnetism of him was more than enough to scatter my thoughts and defenses. When Nikolas sat down beside me that last night, I'd forgotten completely about Julian until he came back with drinks.
Then there was Julian. He was everything someone like me ought to be with; a socialite brimming with charisma and natural beauty. I was attracted to him the moment I spotted him across the bar. There was an easy way about him, the way he walked, talked, even the way he dressed. He was so casually sexual it was hard to ignore, but it wasn't overwhelming in the same way it was with Nikolas. I liked the idea of being with him; I probably would've gone home with him last night if Nikolas hadn't shown up and interrupted. Then again, once Nikolas sat down next to me, Julian was drooling over him just like I was fighting not to. I wasn't expecting him to be bisexual, but that sort of thing didn't bother me – not after everything I'd been through when I'd first moved to New York.
Thinking about the two men brought back painful memories. I didn't want to be ruled by them after so many years, but time didn't dull the pain of it all. I didn't want to think about it anymore. I needed to get my head together, and Ame was always the best at dealing with my shit. I flung the golden-trimmed black comforter from my bed and padded over to my oversized bathroom. The hot water hitting my back helped to lessen the tension I could feel building. It gave me time to collect myself and let the bad thoughts of my past wash away. It was a long time ago, and I couldn't let myself be so affected by it after all this time.
As I toweled off, I thought about what I would wear to the gallery show tonight. Iris always wanted her artists at the show for the entire night, displaying ourselves just like the art. Her words rang in my ear while I made my way to my main wardrobe. "If you don't sell yourself, how can you expect your art to sell?"
I'd slipped into some Miu flats, since it was so nice out and a light blue summer dress. I didn't know what to do with my hair, so I just decided, screw it, and left my bed head the way it was. I looked in the mirror and it looked good enough. I headed downstairs just as Ame texted me to let me know she was downstairs.
When I slipped into the backseat next to Ame, she gawked back at me with oversized and round-rimmed Ray Bans.
"Jesus, I hate you," she said, her head falling back against her leather headrest, "I feel like ass, and you look like a goddamn angel this morning.
"I didn't even do my hair, though."
"You're making me feel uglier by the second." She flicked a wrist and exhaled heavily. "Whatever, I still look amazing if I were next to anyone else. I need a drink."
"You'd probably feel a lot better if you didn't get hammered last night."
"Oliver wanted to party. So we partied. I'm sure he's much worse off this morning than I am. Thank god I'm an artist."
"You have the sass of one. That's for sure."
"Shut up." Her head fell against my shoulder, resting there. "Now tell me what drama you have. I thought I'd rescued you last night. Those two gorgeous men looked like they were ready to strip right then and there."
"God, I don't know." This time I was exhaling, annoyed and confused. "Nikolas is so primal and ravenous, but then in the blink of an eye he's the most sweet and charming man. He's so back and forth it makes me want to rip his clothes off."
"I bet I can guess which one he is." She leaned forward, eyeing me over her shades. "The European in the suit?"
I nodded. "Uh huh."
"Then there's Julian. And, Ame, he's the total opposite of Nikolas. I just want him for the slow burn, enjoying every single second of him."
"Control yourself. If you keep panting, I'm definitely going to throw up."
"Sorry, but god, they're both so hot. Plus they both gave me their business cards." The car pulled up to a bistro, and I pulled her out behind me.
"Ugh, where is the alcohol?"
"We're not even inside yet." I led her to a table and ordered her a mimosa and myself a coffee. "Okay, so. What the hell do I do?" I was fiddling with each of their cards. Nikolas' was black with silver block letters. Julian's was papyrus-coloured with gold calligraphy. I held them both up at her, grimacing. I shouldn't even be considering Nikolas, but he made my blood boil in good and bad ways.
"What do you mean? Choose one?" She drank nearly half her mimosa immediately. "Do you even have to?"
"What, like ask them both out?"
"Why do you have to pick right now? You don't even know them, you spent maybe an hour with those two? Besides, you don't have to date anyone, you can just have some fun. You're not married, and you barely know their names." Ame finished her drink and sat there, shrugging.
"You know how I feel about dating multiple guys, Ame." I felt my voice weaken. I slumped into my chair, suddenly feeling tired.
"I know, believe me. I dealt with the aftermath." She softened. "I'm not saying you have to go back to that. I'm just saying you don't have to decide right now. You can have a little fun. I bet you haven't even messed around since your ex, Gustav."
"Gustav was a freak, and not in the fun way."
"Haha, I don't care how abstract you are. Nobody puts jam on their toast and then eats the toast upside down."
"He also refused to shave his face except on Wednesdays."
"And he had an inferiority complex. He couldn't stand the fact that he never sold his art like we did."
"Iris also hated him." I sipped from my coffee, feeling better. Ame got a second mimosa and drank. We spent the rest of our brunch enjoying some carb-intensive hangover cure sandwiches.
On the car ride back to my studio apartment, I felt a little more at ease and decided to message Julian first. I was going to message Nikolas, but I wanted to make him sweat. I wasn't some girl who he could have by just looking at me. He could afford to wait for once in his life. Didn't know what I was going to do, but I figured what the hell. Julian responded almost immediately.
I could feel the charm he exuded even through his texts. I giggled, excited to see him later this week. I knew I could have fun with Julian because he was so relaxed and down for whatever. When Ame dropped me off and I'd finished my conversation with Julian, I let myself in and undressed in front of blank canvases.
Even though my show was tonight, I still found it relaxing to paint whatever I was thinking or feeling. Iris hadn't been disappointed by my work yet, so I figured there was no harm in being ahead of schedule for once. I shivered abruptly, realizing I hadn't turned off the air conditioning in here. I scurried over and shut it off, letting the natural air keep my naked body warm. I always found painting bare to be easier for me. I felt closer to what I was doing, no barriers.
I arbitrarily picked up some fuchsia paint and began slathering the pure canvas with it, dragging and splattering the brush as I went. Then I grabbed a neon green and worked without thinking, only feeling. I kept up that pace for at least two hours, my mind drifting to other things.
I found myself thinking of Nikolas as I painted, surprised he could enter my thoughts when I was in this mindset. Then again, he was the type of man who could easily o
wn your thoughts, consuming you just by looking at you with interest. I could feel his sexual pull every time I was around him.
My hand suddenly slashed out with the baby blue on the brush. I decided I liked the way it shifted the tone of the painting, so I did it a few more times until I was satisfied and picked a new color at random. He aggravated me, thinking back to his dim view on artists and their work. I put everything into my paintings, as I'm sure a lot of other artists did. It was my life's work, and I was one of the best in New York; nobody compared. That being said, I felt sorry for the partial owner of Der Platz for having such a numb-minded man supporting his work.
It made me want to straddle Nikolas Bertrand and dominate him, show him his ignorance with my body. I was dripping paint, my brush flicking and relaxing as my thoughts took control of it subconsciously. I set it down before I ruined the hardwood even further than I already had.
I stepped back to look at what I'd painted, only to be filled with shock. I'd painted the club from the night before. The one where I'd been between Nikolas and Julian, charged by their sexual tension. I suddenly had the urge to shower. I took my time, soaking myself thoroughly before getting out.
I checked the time, seeing that I had at least five hours before my show began. I picked through the wardrobe and found an aquamarine Chanel dress with lacing. When I zipped myself up, I liked that it hugged my rear so well, and the lacing sleeves accentuated my slender figure. I blindly grabbed some silver Manolo Blahnik pumps. I checked the time again and was thankful to find I had enough time to have someone do my nails, hair, and makeup.
I shook my head, realizing how hopeless I was without Ame to make me look the best. That being said, my natural bed head waves weren't that bad; they actually went pretty well with the dress. I really didn't want to be late for the pre-show drinks with Iris or she'd tear me a new one. I was confident I'd have a good-selling night tonight, even though I labored over the art for it, because Iris always took care of me.